My biggest parenting mistake yet...

...Not getting a shopping cart.

The cards were stacked against me I just didn't realize it until it was too late. Morning playgroup at the park was fine, the walk back to the car was a little unruly but she was walking with her pal, Avery, so they were a little distracted. It was 11:30 the plan was to run to the grocery store quickly to get a few last things for her birthday party tomorrow. I also needed 3 things from the dollar store next door--I even knew what they were, so I didn't get a cart. This often starts a screaming match and I was going to be fast. Lily had other plans. First she wouldn't stay with me, which wasn't out of the ordinary. Then when I tried to hold her hand or arm, she made her whole body go limp. Then she just laid out across the floor refusing to move--and laughing hysterically. I tried all my usual tricks, "Can you help mommy carry this?" "Can you help me find something with Elmo on it?" It worked for about 15 seconds and then she was off to hide down another aisle. She even got to pick out some raisins to buy. But it was all short-lived.

Then we got in line. The aisle was too wide and the cart in front of us didn't keep her corralled. I gave her her water cup. And she ran off, head tipped back drinking water, across the store. I caught her and picked her up, and she went limp like a rag doll, only worse, a squirmy, fidgety rag doll. So I had to get the items from my little hand basket onto the cashier's belt. Lily actually agreed to help with this and then ran away again. Everything was ready for the cashier, I even got my reusable bag out and ready. That didn't stop her from glaring at me. I got Lily back, handed my cash to the cashier and Lily ran off again. Got her back, cashier had bagged everything in plastic bags (4 items, 2 plastic bags, no wonder there's a plastic island the size of Texas in the Pacific). Got my change, re-bagged everything myself, all the while the cashier is glaring at me, like I'm ruining her day. Meanwhile, I have Lily squirming in one hand, the diaper bag slung over my bag, my open wallet, a handful of change, and our (reusable) bag of purchases and then Lily decided to throw her cup on the ground. I'm holding all of this stuff and Lily is making me more and more frustrated and I poked her. In the stomach. Not hard, but I still felt guilty. And she says, "Mommy poke Lily! Mommy poke Lily!" In a surprised sort of way.

So I lean over to pick up the cup and all the change from my wallet dumps all over the floor. Of course it does. This turned out to be a blessing because it distracted Lily for 10 seconds while she picked up all the coins (a current obsession). So I shoved wallets and change and cups in bags as quickly as possible. And then she was off again. By the time I was off after her I couldn't see where she went at all. So I announced I was leaving without her while I continued to look. Then I heard her by the door to the store saying "Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Are you Mommy?" in a very worried voice. Finally got her, and everything else, and got out of the store. We still had to go to the grocery store. Can you guess our first stop? The carts.